So I had this thought today and I really feel like people need to hear it. I think this sort of thing is what Twitter is for I but I’m not really sold on Twitter. Sounds kind of fruity to me.
Anyway, here it is: the two most overrated things in the world are hand jobs and the Beatles and don’t even get me started on getting a handy while listening to the Beatles. I bet you never thought you’d read hand job and the Beatles in the same sentence, but I guess there’s a first time for everything.
HJs are so overrated. Women are terrible at them. They have no rhythm and because of that it takes forever to release your man juice. If I wanted a chaffed sore penis I’d just have sex with a mail box. They just don’t get the subtleties of dick whacking.
So, I don’t know why you’d have someone do something that you could do much better yourself. I mean, by this point I’ve had almost a decade of practice. If jerking off was an Olympic event I would win a gold medal. Wait, why isn’t it an Olympic event?
The Beatles. Completely overrated. When everyone talks about what geniuses they were they only mention their later albums. Everyone just fucking skips over the part where they started of doing teenage pop love songs. And their mythology only grew after Lennon died because after that they couldn’t stick around and start releasing horseshit albums in the 80s and 90s.
I’m not saying they’re bad. They’re a great band, just not as great as everyone thinks. But can you say that to anyone? No, because they’ll have a fucking seizure, which pisses me off because those kind of people probably never heard a Beatles song until they got to college and they usually know next to nothing about music.
Fuck the Beatles, I’ll take the Rolling Stones or The Kinks over them any day.
